One common misconception about abstinence is that only strong, “holier than thou” Christians believe in it. While Christians may believe in abstinence, religion doesn’t necessarily have to be the reason someone believes in abstinence. To simply define abstinence, which I suspect many of you know, is the choice to not have sex. Someone can be abstinent from other things (i.e. drugs, alcohol). Planned Parenthood, which surprised me, explains the importance of abstinence. According to Planned Parenthood (the biggest advocate for “women’s rights/health”) says abstinence is the ONLY 100% method to avoid unwanted pregnancies and STDs. They also promote outercourse, but I don’t. Certain relational aspects should only be with the person you call your soulmate. Abstinence is a relatively cheaper option than birth control. As you can see, Christians are not the only ones who believe in this concept. Before you say, “Planned Parenthood believes in this, so they don’t only advocate for abortions only!” In case you forgot, abstinence doesn’t make PP money, so that’s why they push their biggest moneymaker: abortion.
There are many other benefits to using abstinence. A woman/man who tells their partner they are choosing abstinence will know who the right person for them is. If a man doesn’t respect you for choosing abstinence, he will more than likely screw with the first woman who spreads her legs. The same goes for men looking for a female partner. Someone who believes in abstinence or waiting for the right time will cherish you for life. Look at someone like Ben Shapiro, Lila Rose, or Steven Crowder. They all chose abstinence, and each are happy with their life and spouse. Abstinence seems more satisfying than moments of pleasure from sleeping with 10 different men/women. Another benefit is you can focus on more important aspects of life, such as school or family. I know family and school are important to me, so I choose not to chase each guy who blinks at me. Women my age, unfortunately, don’t believe this. If you want to see more benefits, I will leave the link to the website where Planned Parenthood explains this more.
As I mentioned earlier, for my generation, abstinence is one big joke. So why is this? The two MAJOR reasons I believe abstinence has become the biggest joke in American society are 1) Hollywood promotes sex all the time, and 2) God has become irrelevant in American society. To start, let's look at Hollywood. Most movies from Hollywood you see has some form of sex or nudity. Romance movies have at least one sex scene. Most of these people will sleep around, and not care. Society has picked this habit up of “sleeping around” is cool, and being abstinent deserves ridicule. Lila Rose, the founder of Live Action, stayed abstinent until she married her now husband, and she was mocked for it. Vice President Mike Pence has been teased for never being alone with another woman who isn’t his wife. Steven Crowder wrote in an article how more married couples trust one another if they hadn’t slept on the first date(s), or if they remained celibate until they married. Men and women who say to their significant other, “Why don’t you trust me,” when you slept with that person on the first date will obviously have doubts, which Crowder made a great point about. Who’s to say you wouldn’t put out, like you did on the first date, when something “better” comes along? While abstinence before marriage is a Christian belief, there is a correlation between a husband and wife who didn’t sleep together until marriage. But my main focus is on abstinence as a whole.
Somehow being a “slut” or “man-whore” is more acceptable than being abstinent. How did we reach this point? That brings me into my second reason: a godless society. Many Hollywood elites, as everyone knows, don’t follow God. This has bled into everyone’s life today. No one can “fight these urges,” so we HAVE to have sex. No, we don’t! America was founded on godly values, He knows all. But America has chosen to take control, and chose to live accordingly. Look at how much using drugs, smoking, or drinking has become popular. These bad behaviors and actions are somehow cool. Think about it: good is bad, and bad is good. Everything is backwards!
I don’t understand how someone can call themselves “Pro-choice,” but be against EVERY choice, except abortion. Pro-choice supporters say, “No one wants to get an abortion, but it’s necessary.” Abortion isn’t necessary. There are other options, like abstinence, birth control, adoption, and keeping the child. Four options to one, yet the one option has the most support. Planned Parenthood LITERALLY SAYS that the ONLY 100% effective way to NOT get pregnant/get STDs is abstinence. But I’m going to get back to the topic at hand.
My main issue with abstinence being a joke is no one considers the benefits. It’s automatically, “No one can resist sex,” or “Abstinence doesn’t work, you ‘holier than thou’ Christian.” Really, abstinence doesn’t work? Mind you most people who don’t believe in abstinence are pro-choice. What is the main issue in today’s society? Unwanted pregnancies, which leads to abortions. Everyone remembers Alyssa Milano’s #sexstrike. Let me make this clear to the those who don’t believe in abstinence: one of your biggest advocates for “women’s reproductive rights” just promoted abstinence. Not having sex = no unwanted pregnancies = no abortions needed. Look at how simple this concept is. However, because abstinence is a joke, people would rather call themselves sluts, get pregnant, then get an abortion, or get an STD, than remain abstinent and clean.
Many abstinence-only programs haven’t been working, which I believe is a problem. Instead of advising, these teachers are trying to scare them with the dangers of having sex. A key issue is that abstinence-only programs reach teenagers (usually 10th-12th grade). By this time, these teenagers don’t care/don’t listen to what these programs have to say, and go out and have sex. To be more effective, in my opinion, we need to start a bit earlier, like 7th or 8th grade. Teenagers in this time usually don’t consider sex as much as high schoolers, so teaching them this knowledge would be more useful in the future, as well as continuing the education in high school. Parents need to step up as well and teach their kids. Not to tell them, "If you have sex, you'll die," or anything like that. I simply mean explaining and teaching your child about why abstinence is important. Having this come from your parents rather than an educational program would be more likely to resonate in younger people, but that's just my opinion.
To conclude, everyone needs to stop treating abstinence as a joke. Humans are stronger than they think. We can resist worldly urges, and not give into temptation. God has given us this ability. Many of you may scoff, but you then imply (especially pro-choice women) that we are weak and can’t have the strength to resist. That we are too weak-minded and can't think for ourselves, and that we have to give into sexual pleasures like animals in mating season. I've spoken to some women, and they may disagree with having sex but agree that you shouldn't sleep with every other guy/girl. While they all love their boyfriends and think he's "the one," they don't treat what I say as a joke. In fact, many of them think I'm right, and wished they saved themselves! You don’t have to be religious or a virgin to practice abstinence. Pro-choice says you are abstinent ONLY if you're religious, but that's not true. The same way it's not true that you have to be a virgin to be abstinent. You can choose to stop having sex at ANYTIME. 3 out of 4 teenage girls said they wished they practiced abstinence, and waited longer, to have sex. Practicing abstinence, or having knowledge of it, would be efficient in solving one of the main crises' facing this world. Please stop thinking of this as a joke.
Check out these sites:
My main issue with abstinence being a joke is no one considers the benefits. It’s automatically, “No one can resist sex,” or “Abstinence doesn’t work, you ‘holier than thou’ Christian.” Really, abstinence doesn’t work? Mind you most people who don’t believe in abstinence are pro-choice. What is the main issue in today’s society? Unwanted pregnancies, which leads to abortions. Everyone remembers Alyssa Milano’s #sexstrike. Let me make this clear to the those who don’t believe in abstinence: one of your biggest advocates for “women’s reproductive rights” just promoted abstinence. Not having sex = no unwanted pregnancies = no abortions needed. Look at how simple this concept is. However, because abstinence is a joke, people would rather call themselves sluts, get pregnant, then get an abortion, or get an STD, than remain abstinent and clean.
Many abstinence-only programs haven’t been working, which I believe is a problem. Instead of advising, these teachers are trying to scare them with the dangers of having sex. A key issue is that abstinence-only programs reach teenagers (usually 10th-12th grade). By this time, these teenagers don’t care/don’t listen to what these programs have to say, and go out and have sex. To be more effective, in my opinion, we need to start a bit earlier, like 7th or 8th grade. Teenagers in this time usually don’t consider sex as much as high schoolers, so teaching them this knowledge would be more useful in the future, as well as continuing the education in high school. Parents need to step up as well and teach their kids. Not to tell them, "If you have sex, you'll die," or anything like that. I simply mean explaining and teaching your child about why abstinence is important. Having this come from your parents rather than an educational program would be more likely to resonate in younger people, but that's just my opinion.
To conclude, everyone needs to stop treating abstinence as a joke. Humans are stronger than they think. We can resist worldly urges, and not give into temptation. God has given us this ability. Many of you may scoff, but you then imply (especially pro-choice women) that we are weak and can’t have the strength to resist. That we are too weak-minded and can't think for ourselves, and that we have to give into sexual pleasures like animals in mating season. I've spoken to some women, and they may disagree with having sex but agree that you shouldn't sleep with every other guy/girl. While they all love their boyfriends and think he's "the one," they don't treat what I say as a joke. In fact, many of them think I'm right, and wished they saved themselves! You don’t have to be religious or a virgin to practice abstinence. Pro-choice says you are abstinent ONLY if you're religious, but that's not true. The same way it's not true that you have to be a virgin to be abstinent. You can choose to stop having sex at ANYTIME. 3 out of 4 teenage girls said they wished they practiced abstinence, and waited longer, to have sex. Practicing abstinence, or having knowledge of it, would be efficient in solving one of the main crises' facing this world. Please stop thinking of this as a joke.
Check out these sites:
- https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control/abstinence-and-outercourse/what-are-benefits-and-disadvantages-abstinence-and-outercourse
- https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2017/03/30/mike-pence-doesnt-dine-alone-with-other-women-and-were-all-shocked/
- http://www.ncregister.com/daily-news/pro-abortion-actress-makes-accidental-case-for-abstinence
- http://www.center4research.org/preventing-teen-pregnancy-impact-dolls-abstinence-sex-education/
- https://www.louderwithcrowder.com/sex-might-good/
- https://www.hhs.gov/opa/pregnancy-prevention/birth-control-methods/abstinence/index.html
- https://youngwomenshealth.org/2013/02/22/abstinence/
Comment down below what you think! But no vulgar language. No need to get hostile, we can have an open discussion without hostility! Thank you in advance!
P.S. This video has nothing to do with the discussion, but I wanted to share it. Kodi Lee is a blind and autistic man. He performed on America's Got Talent, and did so well. Speaking from personal experience, I loved seeing this. He is such an inspiration. Here is the link to see his performance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDPdRYF7hTQ. Watch and be prepared to cry!
P.S. This video has nothing to do with the discussion, but I wanted to share it. Kodi Lee is a blind and autistic man. He performed on America's Got Talent, and did so well. Speaking from personal experience, I loved seeing this. He is such an inspiration. Here is the link to see his performance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDPdRYF7hTQ. Watch and be prepared to cry!
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